One too few for bridge but one too many for tennis? Not enough girls to go around at the dance? Or maybe you've just got a girlfriend without a squire of her own? We're here to help with those awkward "third wheels!"

If you and your pal are smitten by the same Sigh Man, you should-

Date him
Bow Out Nobly
Make it a threesome

Let's say you and your best pal are vacationing at a Dude Ranch. Gals meet cowboy - and you¹re both "gone" dogies! Why bow out? Suggest a triple date; your femme friend may have an open mind. You and your cowgirl might both learn a few rope tricks!

Breeze up the aisle together
Take the usher¹s arm
Make it a threesome

Bewitched - and bewildered - at a wedding? All that formality needn¹t panic you. When you arrive at the church and the usher offers his arm - take it, even if you¹ve an escort. Your beau boy will follow you up the aisle, and beyond!

In celebration of the occasion, we're having a threesome party! (Get your mind out of the gutter.) If you're a couple, bring an extra single person. If you¹re a single, find two to accompany you - but you MUST come in multiples of three! No costume required, no thematic soundtrack is planned, but you gotta bring that odd person. Or that odd number of people. Or that odd number of odd people. Anyway, you get the idea.
BONUS: bring someone single and we'll get 'em drunk for free! We'll wash away those post-Valentines blues. And who knows, maybe some of the single folk will meet other single folk. Or perhaps this won't be just a joke of a theme for this party. Regardless, you'll have no excuse to go home alone.