The meals at Hotel Aequa continued to underwhelm. However, they were free with the price of the program, and worth about that much, maybe a little more for nutritional value. Breakfast every day consisted of coffee and bread. The bread was OK, though tiring as it was basically the leftover bread from dinner the night before. The coffee was superb but it didnt have the kick required to make me coherent for the 8:00 AM tour busses.
A quick word about our tour
guides. Larry is the head of the program. Heavyset, balding, pale and
short, the living embodiment of the irritating little worm youd
love to strangle but must, instead, treat with utmost patience and tolerance
because hes the one you need to get your drivers license or
car title or marriage license or other important action that is required
for living on the planet and he knows it as he sits smugly behind the
counter while the line stretches out the door and everyone fumes. Every
time he opens his mouth something illogical, insane, stupid, or at best
deeply irritating comes out. Eventually I realized anything he said was
pretty much exactly the opposite of reality and anytime I use the term
"a Larry" I mean it's something someone says that is a blatant
lie. For example, Larry said "Pack light, nothing but essentials.
You may have to carry your luggage up to a mile", yet two weeks into
the trip there is a formal inauguration ceremony at which you are not
supposed to wear jeans, shorts or tennis shoes. When last I packed
light I did not consider a suit and tie an "essential."
On the other hand, it gave me an excuse to avoid the damned ceremony,
which sounded like something I couldn't help but heckle.
For 8000 lire an hour you can rent a paddleboat and poke around the bay of Napoli (Naples). Its not cheap but its worth it. It was a perfect day for it, just hot enough to want to get in the water, just breezy enough to be tolerable in the sun.
watched the ocean and the sky together,
Charming little boats would
pass by from time to time, the waves lapping against the plastic sides
of our tiny craft. The water was a transparent pool of liquid neon light.
The gray cliffs lined the edges with pretty little Mediterranean buildings
of stucco and tile dotting the hillsides.
You might be thinking to yourself, You idiot, she wants to show off
for you! or some other such nonsense but I can tell you for a fact
she wasnt trying to induce any reaction in me and had no clue as
to what she was doing.
Look, sit at the front and Ill sit at the back turned the
other way and well be fine, I just want to get rid of some tan lines,”
She came back to the boat and climbed up out of the water like a slippery sea snake, her tanned skin shining, the water dripping from her nipples, running down her soft stomach.
I felt the plastic boat deck
melting underneath me.
"First you will come to
the Sirens, who bewitch every one who comes near them. If any man draws
near in his innocence and listens to their voice, he never sees home again,
never again will wife and little children run to greet him with joy; but
the Sirens bewitch him with their melodious song."
Theres an old Harold Arlen
song Between The Devil And The Deep Blue Sea you may be familiar
with, covered by one artist or another. My favorite is the Cab Calloway
version. It fits so well here you'd think I wrote it myself just for this
Or to quote Heathers favorite musician, Tom Waits, She had me harder than Chinese algebra.
We spent the rest of the day
running errands that the all-day tours had prevented (money exchange,
post office, etc.) and eating gelato.
"It was the curse of mankind
that these incongruous fagots were thus bound together that in the agonised
womb of consciousness, these polar twins should be continuously struggling."
When the cattle returned from Paestum, exhausted by the journey, they gave a mixed review but the pottery professor's comment was most memorable, "It was an OK thing not to have seen."
One of the professors had gone
to Herculanium instead of Pompeii. Stepping off the bus, he ran into a
horde of police and bystanders. He asked someone what was up and the local
put two fingers to his head and went "pop pop." He later bought
a paper and discovered that the local Mafioso had been blown away "Chicago
style" - shot in the face while at the barber. I found it odd that
an Italian paper would use the term "Chicago Style."
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nice. Copyright © 2002, All Rights Reserved
All original content on this site is owned by Degenerate Press and cannot be used without our permission. We have lawyers for friends with nothing better to do than cause trouble (no kidding), so play nice. Copyright © 2002, All Rights Reserved