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It's the last gasp of old man winter before the harlot of spring scares him off with her floral print mini-skirt and lusty eyes. Scattered flakes of snow are sliding past the DP HQ window as the squirrels run amok in the attic, staying out of the cold just like us.
The difference is I didn't invade THEIR home.
I've tried plugging the holes, rat traps, mothballs, insecticide bombs, and good ol' fashioned banging on the walls but nothing dissuades them from coming back. I borrowed a book on "how to defeat pests" from my mother and it says the only hope is trapping them or killing them and the longer you wait the worse it gets as they chew up your house and wiring and train their friends and family to join them.
So if anyone has a bb gun they'd let us borrow (it's illegal to discharge firearms in the city or they'd already be full of 9 mm holes) let me know. I don't have the patience to get the traps, get up in the attic, set them, check them until I catch the fuckers then haul them away one by one, especially when they run up and down the tree six feet outside my window taunting me daily.
In other news I'd like to congratulate degenerate MAC on his upcoming nuptials. This summer is one of those where every damn weekend someone I know is getting legally hitched. This happens to me every few years, a strange cycle of a couple of summers of nobody getting married, then a summer where everyone gets married, then a few summers of quiet, then a summer of divorces, then quiet, then marriages again. I'm one of the last of my tribe thus far unwed, though those of our tribe still single are pretty much singe for good reason, not just bad luck. While I do miss those late nights of desperation back when the tribe all lived in the village and everyone was single and lonely and bored and crazy, I don't think my liver or my sanity could take the weekly abuse so I'm glad we've settled down a bit. I just hope the settlements are close enough to the frontier for the occasional adventure!
TELEVISION, THE DRUG OF THE NATION
So it was the Grammy's last night. I wouldn't have known except that none of the TV shows I like to watch were showing new episodes and I couldn't figure out why. Then I noticed E! was showing the red carpet stuff (I didn't WATCH the red carpet stuff - I'd pay big money, even in my unemployed state, to take a bat to Joan Rivers' head) and remembered it was time for yet another pointless, self-congratulating industry award show. I can't watch any of them. I don't feel the suspense the other viewers feel waiting for the Best _____ of the Year award - it's never awarded to me. And what do I care if someone else gets a slap on the back and a lot of extra income they already don't need? All I can think of is Public Enemy's "Burn Hollywood", followed by Rage Against the Machine with "Down Rodeo."
Fortunately Comedy Central had something new on, Dave Attel's show Insomniac. The show is basically the exact show I dreamt up last summer after watching the incredibly dull and dorky Rick Steves' travel show. Rick's problem is he's basically a nice, straight, 9-5 kinda guy who likes to get home early to enjoy the company of his wife and 2.5 kids. If he's still out after the sun goes down you wonder if he's up past his bedtime. He needs someone to take over about then, "OK, now that the kids, and Rick, are tucked safely in their beds let's see what nightlife Rome has to offer..."
This is almost what Insomniac is and this week was the Atlanta episode. As expected, they hit Buckhead but they also featuring some of my favorite clubs (The Clermont) and even a degenerate or two (JN and probably others.) The show isn't quite the travel guide I thought up, though Dave does mention a bit of the city's history and mentions the names of the places he's going, but it's really more about the comical late night encounters with local drunks.
We got Mudcat's "Christmas 2001" CD in packaging that immediately made degenerate SW giggle, "Definitely not pretentious." A welcome change from the occasionally overly glossy press kits we get from time to time, Mudcat's CD is packaged in what looks to be recycled construction paper with magic marker and ballpoint pen sloppy handwritten song lists on the back, and a bad photocopy of Danny with a goatee drawn over his face in magic marker like that old Daffy Duck cartoon - immediately you know this is a down-home, back porch production. The music oozes out like an old victrola, drawing you in with an intimate, minimal sound, mostly just Danny's voice over his acoustic guitar with very little other instrumentation, sounding at once both old and new - timeless. This CD is the quiet Mudcat, closer to Danny's solo efforts than the full-on party the band as a whole creates. If you're in the mood for some acoustic blues and your Robert Johnson vinyl 78's are just too precious to play pick up this CD. You might have to get it at a show, or hit his web site at www.mudcatblues.com
You can catch Mudcat live, always a good show, this Saturday the 2nd at S.P.O.T., 595 North Ave at Northside (no, I don't know where that is either and I only live two blocks away.) He's also playing live on WREK, 91.1, next Tuesday, March 5, at 10 PM.
Meanwhile, we got this email a couple of days ago:
"I love The Unsatisfied review, I'd like to invite Degenerate press to The Star Bar on 3/16 were playing with puddin and Asphalt blasters. Come see how bad we are now. any press is good press
Thanks Eric J Scealf p.s. check out our suckie web site www.theunsatisfied.com"
Now THERE is a positive attitude! If only we had more folks like this on the Atlanta scene...
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